Serious Procrastination

You know how there are different levels of seriousness for murder? Murder in the first degree, murder in the second degree, manslaughter- I get the manslaughter one, I mean hey, it was just a mistake, running with scissors ectetera, but what is the difference between first and second degree? You still go to jail, or so I hear, and them jails are not as nice as the pamphlets make them out to be. Perhaps its a status thing.
"I did a murder and all I got was 2nd Degree Murder on your tee-shirt or something. First the worst, second the best, manslaughter the golden eagle.
I never understood that rhyme. There were no golden eagles ever, and I was always last anyway so it didn't mak any difference.

Well, that preamble was just to set the scene and give you, gentle reader, something with which to compare my epic procrastination to. This has been a day of first degree procrastination. It was premeditated, willfully exected and I've been trying to cover up the evidence ever since. If this was a race, the person who came first would be about to be given the gold medal when suddenly everyone would realize that I had crossed the line first and had just kept on running and had in fact came first twice. Then I shot the third place guy and stole his eagle, the fucker.

I did have good intentions this morning, I swear. Got out of bed early, came to my office, armed with my notes on the article that I was supposed to write up, then somehow read three years worth of an online web comic. I think this action was provocotatededined by the fact that I still haven't got a job and I still have no money and I'd really like a drink. I'm going to go a beg people to lend me some money soon under the guise of various lies so that tonight I can forget that the work I was supposed to do today I have a meeting about tomorrow. I'm fairly certain I can get most of it done tomorrow morning, but still, once the spiral of procrastination gets to you it can be difficult to get out of.

Like alligators. All them teeth.

Fun fact of the day: Apparently you cannot find the sheet music for "Five Spot After Dark" for free online! I have sucessfully proven that the internet is not infinite, only infinite in terms of pornography.