Friday, June 05, 2009

12 minutes before work super fast blog

HOLDIDAYS! Holidays happen soon after today FOREVER! Well, five weeks, but thanks to a edict passed down from the world institute of naming things (they never claimed to be good at naming things) a stretch of time totalling five weeks exactly can now be called "Forever". The reason being that we have names for two weeks, four weeks and even a period of 52 weeks, and so we obviously need a name for five. And since they couldn't be bothered coining a new term they just used an existing word. It is also hoped that this will stop plumbers and electricians from quoting that the work needed will take forever, and then living off you till the end of your life.

Ever wondered why there are so many damn plumbers in Tahiti? Thats why.

In other news that isn't so obviously made up, I am going to play poker tonight. But not for money, because gambling is a vice that lays open your soul ready to be snared by the devil. And because we are all really bad a poker and the las time we played with money, none of us one. The fifteen dollars is now kept in an ai tight bok, buried at the bottom of the garden, along with with three hands of two pairs of two. Thats how bad we were.
But Anywhoo. Queens of the stone age and low priced beer will be my friends tonight, as we jelosly horde our precious match sticks against those who would take them from us. Tommorow I shall go to the birth place of Katherine Mansield and clean my rancid living space.

I now live alone, by the way. People have warned me, my friends, my father, the festering hobo at the buss stop at the corner of cuba and manners, all have warned me that such a move might, finnally, make me so crazy that I no longer have the ability to tell the difference between the imaginary people I converse with everyday in my head and the weasle ridden, post apocalyptic world I actually inhabit. Oh reality checks. You can bee too cruel.

1 comment:

daveawayfromhome said...

Imaginary roommates never drink all your milk except for the last ounce or two so that they can technically claim that they "did not drink all the milk!".

Well, almost never.